She'd Love Me, Like Fireworks
by inanawfulmess
Summary: Quinn and Rachel take Beth to fireworks for the first time.


**Title:** She'd Love Me, Like Fireworks  
**Author:** **inanawfulmess**  
**Rating:** PG  
**Length:** 2300  
**Spoilers:** We'll say Season 1, but if you know the general gist of the show you're probably safe.  
**Summary:** Quinn and Rachel take Beth to fireworks for the first time.  
**Author's Note:** This is the first story in a continuing future-fic family-verse about Rachel and Quinn raising Beth together. I clearly don't own anything in this story, and all mistakes are mine. Title is from Ben Lee's _Catch My Disease_. Feel free to comment! Thanks!

* * *

"Mama!" Beth whispered loudly, poking a small finger into Rachel's side. "Mama!"

"What, peanut?" Rachel answered in a stage whisper of her own, giggling quietly. Although Rachel loved absolutely everything about her daughter, the fact that the only thing that differentiated Beth's whispers from her normal speaking voice was how the girl cupped a hand around her mouth went near the top of the list of her favorite things.

"Why is Mommy sleeping?"

Rachel glanced to her side where Quinn was lying flat on her back on their blanket, eyes closed and arms crossed over her chest. Rachel took in the defensive position and paused to study Quinn's face before seeing her eyes blink open before quickly shutting again. Rachel knew that Quinn wasn't truly asleep, but she understood that she just needed a moment to herself, a quiet second apart from the excitement of the day and her daughter's jubilance at being allowed up past her bedtime. Sending a slight smile Quinn's way and hoping she'd feel it even with her eyes closed, Rachel turned back to their daughter and hoisted her onto her lap. "Well," Rachel said, smiling and nuzzling her nose into Beth's hair, "Mommy had so much fun playing in the swimming pool with you at Grampy and Papa's Fourth of July picnic this afternoon that she needs to take a little nap so she won't fall asleep during the fireworks!"

Quinn couldn't help the small smile that graced her lips at Beth's quiet giggle and exclamation of "Mommies don't need naps!"

Rachel laughed too and squeezed Beth tighter against her. "Sometimes they do, silly girl! Being a mommy can be very, very tiring."

While Quinn had to agree that was certainly true, she wasn't exactly tired today, not in the physical sense anyway. Celebrating the Fourth with Rachel's family had been different from what she was used to, and that difference was emotionally exhausting. Prior to Beth's birth, when Quinn was just the cliché blond cheer captain daughter from a highbrow Christian family and not somebody's mommy, Independence Day had been her favorite day of the year. Every summer, the Fabray family would attend the Fourth of July church picnic. She and her sister and friends would play with sparklers and poppers and make s'mores while their parents gathered around a campfire drinking and talking about the latest news. And when it was finally dark enough, Quinn's father would scoop her up onto his shoulders as they climbed to the tallest hill in the park. He'd set Quinn on his lap, or, when she was older he'd wrap an arm around her as they sat next to each other, and they'd watch together as the fireworks exploded above them. Quinn so vividly remembered leaning back onto her daddy's strong chest and feeling his arms around her. Even though she was once scared of the fireworks, the loud sound and the echoing rumble she could feel throughout her entire body, she always felt safe with her dad's arms around her.

Shaking her head slightly to clear her mind of those distant memories, Quinn thought back on the more recent past, the night before when, long after Beth had fallen asleep in her own bedroom down the hall, she and Rachel had lain awake, tangled up in each other. It was then that Quinn had confessed her trepidation to Rachel, her worry that she wouldn't be able to handle the fireworks without her family, wouldn't be able to find her own way through a tradition that had been so important to the upbringing she was no longer allowed to claim as her own.

"I'll be right there with you," Rachel had whispered into her hair. "Me and Bethy. We'll protect you. I'll hold you. I'll keep you safe."

And Rachel had. That night, and into the early morning, Rachel had kept her arms around Quinn, one leg tossed over both of Quinn's longer legs, stroked her hair as she cried, and whispered soothing words into her ear.

"I'm worried too," Rachel had confessed sometime in the middle of the night. "I was always glad when you didn't want to go to fireworks before, I was…" she trailed off, before looking Quinn in the eye and biting her lip nervously. "I was worried about her ears. I just…I just don't want anything bad to happen to her, she's just so perfect, so incredible." Rachel took a deep breath. "Sometimes I feel like I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop, you know? What did we do so right along the way to end up with the world's most perfect daughter? What if it's just that her eardrums are fragile and we don't know it yet? What if she can't handle the sound?"

Quinn had smiled in spite of herself, wiping the tears from her face and then Rachel's before snuggling into Rachel's embrace and tucking her head in the crook of Rachel's neck. "Hundreds of children smaller than Bethy see fireworks all the time, baby. She would have been fine. She will be fine."

"I know that," Rachel had assured Quinn, rubbing gentle circles on her back. "I know she would have been okay last year, or the year before, and she will be okay tomorrow. I just worry." Rachel pressed her lips gently to the top of Quinn's head. "She's so perfect Quinn, I'd never want to mess that up."

"I know, baby," Quinn had said, hugging Rachel tighter. "You're a great mom." And even though she had assured Rachel that Beth would be fine and made her promise to relax and enjoy the evening out with their daughter, Quinn couldn't hold back a smile that morning when she had seen Rachel sneak a packet of earplugs into the bag they'd packed with bug spray and sweatshirts for the fireworks show.

Quinn was brought back to the present when she felt Rachel's hand gently trace a line down her face. She opened her eyes to see the other woman smile at her, the look in Rachel's eyes telling Quinn to take her time and work through her feelings, but remember that she was there if she needed anything. Since the day her parents had found out she was pregnant and she had been kicked out of her house, Quinn had done a lot of thinking, but mostly went back and forth between two distinct thoughts: one where she wanted nothing more than to feel her father's arms surrounding her again, keeping her safe, and telling her that she'd always be his little girl, and another where she wanted absolutely nothing to do with the family who raised her ever again. Days like today, when she could so clearly picture what her family would be doing and think back on the specific memories of the good times they had together, were the days that she seemed to dwell on that first thought. How could her family leave her? How could she survive without them, for all intents and purposes orphaned at sixteen, alone in the world? Quinn squeezed her eyes shut, willing the tears that were welling up not to fall.

"Mama?" Quinn heard Beth ask again a moment later and looked over to see her daughter curled up in Rachel's lap, her head on Rachel's chest.

"Hmm?" Rachel hummed gently, stroking a hand through Beth's soft blond curls.

"Is Mommy sad?"

"Why do you think Mommy's sad, baby?"

Rachel watched as Beth shifted in her lap and pointed at Quinn as a few stray tears rolled down her cheek.

"Can I tell you a story, peanut?" Rachel asked, laying back on the blanket and pulling Beth down with her before snuggling her daughter into her side. "You know how we talked about how there are all different kinds of families?" Beth nodded. "And how Mommy and I love you and take care of you so we're your family? And when I was little like you, Papa and Grampy took care of me so they're my family?"

"And I love you and Mommy and Grampy and Papa so we're a really good family!"

"Right, kiddo," Rachel smiled. "But back a long time ago before you were born, Mommy had her own Mommy and Daddy who took care of her."

"She did?" Beth asked incredulously.

"She did," Rachel laughed, then paused. She couldn't explain to her daughter that she had essentially been the catalyst that prompted her grandparents to disown her mother. Rachel knew that, eventually, Beth would learn the story behind her birth, but she didn't need to know that yet. "Well, one day when Mommy found out that you were going to come and be our baby, she decided to move in with me so we could take care of you together and she doesn't get to see her Mommy and Daddy very often anymore. And sometimes she is sad because she remembers how much fun she used to have with them. But she loves you, baby, and she's really happy that you came to live with us."

And that's when Quinn remembered the third thought she always had, the one that often hit her after she waffled back and forth between missing and needing her family and never wanting to see them again. It was this thought that she liked most of all, but also seemed the hardest to remember: she was happy. Quinn loved her life with Rachel and she never once wished she hadn't had Beth. She may no longer be spending holidays with the Fabray family, but, when she really thought about it, Quinn knew that somehow losing her first family had allowed her to gain this new one.

"I'm happy too." Beth's voice jarred Quinn back to the here and now and she opened her eyes, turning her head to watch Rachel and Beth together, a sight that never seemed to get old.

"So am I, peanut. So am I." Rachel squeezed Beth against her and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, before putting on a big smile and lightly tickling Beth's stomach. "Are you excited for the fireworks? They're going to start soon!"

Beth nodded vigorously before rolling over to lay on her back and point to the sky. "I want to see a pink one!"

"I bet you will, peanut, and blue, and green, and yellow, and maybe, if we're really lucky, we'll see purple!" Beth giggled and snuggled in to her mother, who whispered, "Fireworks can be kind of loud, sweetie, so it's okay if you need to plug your ears. You can cover them with your hands if it gets to be too much or I brought special earplugs for you if you need them, okay?" Beth put her little fingers into Rachel's ears and laughed as Quinn rolled onto her side and gently ran a hand down Rachel's back.

"Hey!" Rachel stage whispered again, making sure Quinn could hear her. "Want to see if we can make your mommy smile?" Beth nodded enthusiastically as she sat up. "Why don't you go give her a big kiss and a hug and tell her it's almost time for the fireworks to start?"

Without pausing to answer, Beth climbed over Rachel's body and landed right on top of Quinn before crawling up to reach her face. Wrapping her arms around her mother, Beth placed a soft kiss on Quinn's forehead and said gently, "Mommy, mommy, wake up now. Fireworks!"

Quinn made a show of yawning and stretching before she peeked her eyes open and smiled at Beth, who was still hovering over her. "Hi, baby! Is it almost time?"

Beth nodded vigorously before jumping up and down on Quinn's stomach and pointing to the sky. "Pink and green and yellow fireworks!"

"Really, Bethy? Do you think we'll see all the colors in the rainbow?" Beth nodded again, but a look of complete panic crossed her face as the first firework of the evening lit up the sky with a loud crack and she dove forward and buried her face in Quinn's neck. Quinn shared a look with Rachel, then pressed a gentle kiss to Beth's head. "It's okay, baby, that's just the fireworks. Mama told you they'd make a lot of noise, right?" She paused and Beth pulled away nod before snuggling up against Quinn again. Quinn felt her heart break a little at the tears in Beth's eyes, but hugged her daughter tighter against her. "Everything's fine, sweetie. We'll keep you safe."

Rachel scooted over on the blanket as Quinn sat up, holding Beth in her lap, and wrapped her arm around Quinn's shoulder and used her other to rub gentle circles on Beth's back. "I just saw a pink one, peanut," Rachel whispered into Beth's ear. "It was really, really pretty. You should look, Beth."

Beth turned her head on Quinn's shoulder to look at Rachel, who pointed up to the sky. After a nod from Rachel and a gentle push from Quinn, Beth turned around on her mother's lap and looked up to the sky. Her eyes lit up as she saw first a yellow firework, then a blue, and then finally, a pink. "Pink!" she called. "Mama, it's pink! Pretty!"

"It is pretty, peanut," Rachel answered, pressing a kiss to Beth's forehead and then leaning over to Quinn and gently kissing her lips. "Are you okay?" she whispered, resting her forehead against Quinn's own.

Quinn nodded before tilting her head to the side to lean on Rachel's shoulder. Snuggling in, Quinn relaxed into Rachel's embrace as she held Beth against her as well. "I'm good, Rach. I just needed a minute to get remember something." She smiled at Rachel's raised eyebrow, then looked up at the sky, taking in the fireworks. She felt Rachel kiss her hair and Beth snuggle in closer against her before answering Rachel's silent question. "I've got my family right here."


End file.
